She Beat PTSD, Depression, And Anxiety With Yoga. Now She’s Helping Others Do The Same.

Heidi Williams has been a rape victim and sufferer of PTSD, anxiety, and major depression. When she almost lost her 6-month-old child, she even attempted to commit suicide.

"Perfectionism is a serial killer of happiness" -Brene Brown Sometimes we talk about being a "perfectionist" as being a great thing. We talk about it in job interviews like our biggest problem is that we are really just "too good" at things. But by definition a perfectionist is someone who is only satisfied with perfection. It doesn't mean you're perfect… It means you'll never be willing to take risks, or even try, for fear that you wont be good enough. It means that you'll never be able to fully enjoy the people around you, because they wont be good enough. When you are only satisfied once perfection is achieved, you forfeit enjoying the beauty of growth, the beauty of nature, the beauty of the human condition in general. And to me there is nothing more beautiful in life than that. Photo magic: @kariannphoto Flower crown: @thefauxbouquets Hair: @styled_by_carolynn

A photo posted by heidiwilliams89 (@heidiwilliams89) on Aug 19, 2016 at 10:23am PDT

But those dark days are now buried in her past, thanks to the inner peace she found through an unlikely avenue — yoga.

Calling all my Utah Goddesses… On august 26th at 6:00 I am co-hosting an "I AM ENOUGH" Girls Night Out with my love @foreverhhy To remind each and every one of us just how incredible we are! This night is totally FREE and consists of: Cleansing Facials Luscious Hand Treatments Therapeutic Reflexology Rejuvenating Yoga Delicious Refreshments and some Nourishing Girl Time Come play and bring all your loves…Because you damn well deserve a night off! If you are a girl and you are in Northern Utah, direct message me and I will send you the address! Tag all your girlfriends below and I cant wait to hug and kiss each and every one of you!!! Photographer:@kariannphoto Flowers: @thefauxbouquets Hair: @lacedhairextensions @styled_by_carolynn

A photo posted by heidiwilliams89 (@heidiwilliams89) on Aug 15, 2016 at 7:25pm PDT

“It was in this place of mental illness hell that I found yoga and grace. Yoga brought me to a safe place again. A place of peace and self-acceptance,” Williams said.

Are you barely breathing and calling it life? Are you hardly eating, pretending to survive? Are you living your life out of guilt, fear and shame? Do you know who you are? Do you know your own name? If no one was watching, if nobody knew would you still do the things that you do? When the people are gone and the pressure is off Are you still as hard?  Or are you tender and soft? Do you see yourself in the blossoming flowers? Do you hear yourself in earths monsoon showers? Go look in the mirror, right in your eyes i want you to get it, i want you to realize The only words that matter, the only words that are true are "I AM ENOUGH, and so are you." Photographer: @kariannphoto Hair: @styled_by_carolynn

A photo posted by heidiwilliams89 (@heidiwilliams89) on Aug 9, 2016 at 12:54pm PDT

The practice has brought the colors back to her life and she’s even become a help those who are now in the same place where she once was.

I've had this itch lately. I've gotten that feeling. You know, the one that's gently screaming "PULL YOUR SHIT TOGETHER GIRL! WE'VE GOT BIGGER PLANS FOR YOU!" I've been so hesitant to answer this call. Mostly due to my own self doubt. So God has been sending these really loud messages. And I just got another one today. It came in the form of a lover of mine who I actually do not even know, who had the courage to share her heart with me. This was not my mom, it wasn't a sister, it wasn't my husband or my best friend. This was one of YOU GUYS! You don't know the kind of power your words have. Your comments of love and kindness are answering prayers. They are sending much needed messages. They are powerful beyond your comprehension!! THEY ARE MOVING PEOPLE! Please remember that! Don't hold your love in! Don't keep that amazing energy to yourself! Spread your love! Because it's working! It's healing. It's empowering! these heart felt comments and loving words are changing the world! YOU ARE CHANGING THE WORLD! 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A photo posted by heidiwilliams89 (@heidiwilliams89) on Jul 17, 2015 at 3:29pm PDT

“I was able to heal from my mental illnesses and have now dedicated my life and career to helping others through the self-healing process,” she explained.

And then this happened. Hahahahaha this was from the video I was taking too. Now I know where Silas gets his animated faces. Plank pose for @bryceyoga @absoluteyogaacademy #bryceyoga #absoluteyogaacademy

A photo posted by heidiwilliams89 (@heidiwilliams89) on Dec 11, 2014 at 1:14pm PST

Williams’ recovery closed one door and opened another, better one. Williams inspires others and shares her message of hope through online support groups where people can connect with each other.

I feel inadequate. So I haven't posted much at all. I scroll through my feed and see so many inspirational thoughts and poses and pictures of people living fabulous lives.  And I feel guilty. And I start feeling like I need to be more positive.  I need to write about happier things.  I guess that's what happens when you have so many eyes on you.  You start feeling pressure to be better than you are.   To be prettier.   To be positive.  To be perfect. But I'm not.  I don't have inspirational words for you.  I don't have pretty pictures for you.  This one was taken quite a while ago. One that I thought was awkward and I wasn't going to post. But today I felt it was fitting. It's not pretty.  It's not moving. It's just kind of weird. Like me right now. I'm a week overdue with a baby I'm semi terrified to meet.  I waddle like a walrus.   I haven't felt pretty in months now.   I'm not going to talk about how awesome my life is.  Because I'm dealing with a lot of insecurities.  I don't feel strong enough for so much of what I'm being asked to do right now.  And I feel like the odd man out almost all the time when I post stuff like this. But I've missed posting.  So here you go.   This is me.  This is real life.   You're welcome. 

A photo posted by heidiwilliams89 (@heidiwilliams89) on Jan 17, 2016 at 5:21pm PST

Her practice focuses on therapeutic classes and retreats designed for those who are suffering from the same demons that once haunted her.

The definition of Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.- Anonymous Who is ready for an EMOTIONAL DETOX?? Starting this Sunday I am hosting my very first 7 DAY EMOTIONAL CLEANSE. During this Cleanse we will be… 1 Identifying  Triggers, self-destructive behavior and false belief systems that have kept you from experiencing the inner strength, peace and happiness you know is inside of you, but seemed buried under trauma or over all a heaviness you cant seem to identify. 2. Challenging, Dismantling and Eradicating the false belief beliefs keeping you stuck in a downward spiral 3. Establishing a new belief system based on your peace and truth.  I will be including Meditations, Yoga, Exercise, Nutrition, Essential Oils, Teas and any other tool that have been my go-to's during my  own healing journey. You can particitpate at whatever level works for you, but I will say, the more you show up, the more results you will get. I will be taking you through a very similar proccess to the one I went through when I cleared my own PTSD trigger. This proccess can be incredibly transformative if you allow it to transform you. With that, I cannot wait to spend the whole week clearing emotional space with you!!! xoxoxoxoxo  See you Sunday!! click the link in bio to join us as we detox our emotions and open ourselves up to new found peace, health and happiness PHOTO WIZARD: @kariannphoto Pants: @flexilexi_fitness

A photo posted by heidiwilliams89 (@heidiwilliams89) on Sep 2, 2016 at 1:59pm PDT

As a way to display the strength, flexibility, and grace that our bodies are capable of achieving, Williams contorts herself into various yoga poses, and shares photos on her Instagram account.

Pain is vast. It's powerful and it's demanding. Its sources are endless. And every one unique. Each stab has its own particular way of cutting. New tears are produced for every single nerve that is set on fire. Until it is too much. And there is nothing you can do but lay down and feel it. Letting it wash over you in waves. Until you are drowning… Please remember that there are beautiful souls out there that are currently under water. That there is pain you've never felt in the eyes of the people you pass every day. Especially the ones who are misbehaving. Please be kind. Please be compassionate. Please understand that you won't understand. And it's ok. That you don't need to be able to relate to someone to be able to share your love. That just being human in this world full of shit is enough to say "I see you. I see your pain. I'm so sorry. And I love you." that's all.

A photo posted by heidiwilliams89 (@heidiwilliams89) on May 19, 2015 at 5:20pm PDT

She pairs the amazing pictures with inspirational quotes and uplifting stories to light the way for those still struggling with their own demons, and to show that despite the circumstances, it’s possible to find emotional peace.

4 years ago, I experienced my first PTSD attack 2.5 years ago, I found myself in the middle of a painful love affair. 2 years ago my best friend stopped talking to me. During my darkest days I needed desperately to know 2 things: 1. I am not alone 2. I am worthy of love and allowed to take care of myself. That is what tonight's party is all about. For those who are stressed.  For those who are depressed For those who have anxiety For those who are depleted For those who are tired For those who just need space to breathe. Let me bring you relief. Let me bring you joy. Let me bring you peace.  Let me bring you life. Let me bring you vitality. Let me bring you space to breathe and just be yourself. See link in bio or message me for invitation/directions. SEE YOU BEAUTIFUL GIRLS TONIGHT! Flower crown: @thefauxbouquets Photo magic: @kariannphoto Hair: @styled_by_carolynn @lacedhairextensions

A photo posted by heidiwilliams89 (@heidiwilliams89) on Aug 26, 2016 at 10:34am PDT

You can follow Williams on Instagram or sign up for her support group on Facebook.